1) I am the biggest klutz on the planet: I recently started my new job at a school with a population of over 2000 students. While doing my rounds, I pass through the main ground in the school, which connects all four sections together and there are at least 50-100 students in the ground at all times. Since I'm new and look young (story of my life, sigh)I get all types of curious stares and glances often. So on my third day at work I was walking purposefully down the pavement to step up onto the veranda of the senior section (AND it was breaktime, so at least 500 students were in the ground). In my head I thought, how embarassing would it be if I fell? (the same feeling I got in 2009 when I was reading the push/pull signs in T-block and ended up tripping in front of 10 drivers in the parking lot - and rupturing my wrist tendon)and lo and behold, I tripped on the stairs in front of a thousand kids. And to top it off, nobody helped me up, so I had to stay composed, gather my stuff, do an inaudible girly 'ouch' and rub my elbow to gain sympathy and not laughs, and kept walking ahead.
2)I can be pretty bitchy if I wanna: So last week I was walking down another ominous corridor and saw a group of teenages students, 8 girls and 1 boy sitting in the distance to where I was walking, and they were all STARING at me with craned necks. Not only was it really OBVIOUSLY rude, it was really absurd for them to all just be staring in my direction (or so I thought at the time) for more than 20 seconds. So, I went to them, stopped and said "excuse me?" to the group and they looked up at me bewildered and dumb. I looked at the boy and said "Is there a problem?" (for lack of better vocabulary at that point in time). He replied "No" (in a paindoo accent). "Then what are you staring at?". "Oh. I wasn't staring at you maam" he responded retardedly. To which I gave him an icy stare and then sauntered off, hoping I wouldnt trip again and ruin my exit into-a-cloud-of-dust moment.
I think I have created enemies in my workplace for the second time. (The first time obviously was the WWF retard who alleged I was using the landline for "three hours everyday" for personal calls - sucker ended up apologizing to me, and I had the last laugh)
3) I'm going to make pancakes now!